Work Stories Part 1 (McDonalds and Wal-Mart)

I have been told there are a few topics that I never blog about that I should blog about. The major ones are work and school. So this post is all about my views of work and how I think about Work.

My job history goes like this. I got my first job when I was 16 working at McDonalds in High School. I started off working the front counter and my first day I didn't understand how to operate this DOS POS system and they thought I was not capable of doing the front end stuff. So that summer I got moved to the grill area and was the nominated "Meat McBitch" Where your sould purpose was to cook the meat used in all the food. They had two types of Beef. 10-1 and 4-1 which basically means 10 patties in 1lbs and 4 patties in 1lbs. They cooked in 41 and 92 seconds and it was a hot ass summer and but it was great people and we could just have a good laughing time. Then they moved me to making sandwiches and I was the only crew person who could handle "McBitch" and "McGuy who Makes the Sandwiches" they were like woah this guy doesn't suck and I was promoted to a manager at 17 of McDonalds. I worked there until August 2001 and then moved to Indiana.

When I got to Indiana I was jobless for about a month and then I job possibly the worst possible job that any person could get. Which was a Wal-Mart cashier at store #1492 in Kokomo, IN. There was this demon bitch manager named Linda Leake who ran the store. She was just a total psycho and her husband was some manager above her. Gave new meaning to working your way to the top.

Now I have an amazing hate for the Wal-Mart Corporation for the way they do business and how they treat their employees. This store I worked in was at the heart of the Ghetto of America which is the midwest. I enjoyed the first three days of my working for this company.

Now Wal-Mart is where the cheap people who have nothing or just slightly above come to shop to save 3-4cents on whatever. Then Bitch if the price is off by one cent. This job brought my attitude to this amazing negative point and just gave me a bad impression of the midwest. I was the only male cashier in this store the rest were either old ladies or pregnant teenagers.

Anyways back to the topic at hand. Wal-Mart Cashier. Now the hours were never set and you got your schedule 3 weeks in advanced. Which means you have to plan your life 3 weeks in advanced which means you have to be prepared for everything. I had one Saturday off in 2 years that I worked for this company. But the hours were always something like this and I would have been given 40hrs if I had wanted them but I needed an extra day off from the hell of this company. So here is my example work schedule with school at the time.

M- 2pm-11pm
T- Work Off School 6am-7pm
W- 4pm - 1am
TH- Work Off School 7am-6pm
F- 2pm-11pm
S- 6am-3pm
SU - 2pm - 11pm

That was my schedule 90% of the time. The benefits at Wal-Mart you got a discount card that gave you 10% everything in the store except for groceries. You had to pay out the ass for health insurance that you can't afford working for just above min wage.

Now I wish I had my DVD of Clerks with me with the famous quote that says "This job would be great if it wasn't for the god damn customers" Being a customer of anything seems to have the mentality that you have the right to bitch about anything and everything. But do you really expect me a guy making just over min wage to really care what you a fat ugly person who is shopping at Wal-Mart arguing with me about the price of 13 cent Top Ramen being 10cents last week? I could really give a shit about what you have to think and would just enjoy having you shut up and having your kids shut up.

Now as most people know I am not religous and being in Indiana is a religon haven for everybody. You see more churches then you do coffee joints. People were so narrow minded that they couldn't accept me for a person they saw me probably as some form of the anti-christ. I remember this customer went through my line and checked him and his wife out and at the end I was like have a good day and they told me "God Bless you and Jesus Loves You" (WTF?!) I responded with something polite along the lines of "I appreciate that but that is not my thing" they were beyond freaked out so after that next day I come in all these people are waiting for me and are waiting to get in my line and come to me and say "Jesus Loves You" I had 268 customers that day and 126 of them told that to me. I have no idea why I remember that fact but it serves me an odd memory to recall that. But anyways I finally snapped on one of these bible thumpers and was like "I can respect that you have your own beliefs I would ask that you respect mine. But trying to convert me to your beliefs by pissing me off probably is not the best way. You just had me develop a more negative attitude about what you believe in. Now I suggest you call your little cult off before I seek the managment about this" They loved their precious Wal-Mart to much to want that to happen after that day never happened again. (Side Note: At my current school I have yet to see anyone outside passing out bibles like they did at the schools in Indiana. I thought this was a bizarre action. On a Side Side Note according to a survey of book stores the most shoplifted books are 1. Cliff's Notes 2. The Bible 3. The Koran)

Customers are what pay for your pay check yes I understand this. But if you have a valid complaint make sure it's worth my time over 3 cents on crappy MSG noodles. Calling off Sick for Wal-Mart is a bunch of bull shit. Now I have only called off sick 3 times from any of the jobs I have ever had.

1. McDonalds - Coming back on a Bus Trip from Indiana from sitting on a Bus for 53hrs my feet got swollen with water in them and I could hardly walk and had to have a tube put in to drain all the extra water. I called off for that since that job was standing 8hrs a day.
2. Wal-Mart - I had 2 days off in a row and I got sick and had been introduced to my friend John on all my days off. I called in Sick and had to talk to the Dick known as Manager Dean. He told me to take Pepto Bismol and come in anyways. I was like screw this I called off and hung up the phone.
3. Wal-Mart - I called off because I was just in a bad mood and wanted to go turn in job applications all day.

Anyways the best experience I had at Wal-Mart was when I got hired at Best Buy in Carmel, IN and I was at work on top of the world because I knew I was leaving. I am not eligible for a Re-Hire at any Wal-Mart in the world because of this. I put in my two weeks notice and Best Buy called me and said Hey can you start on Monday. I was like sweet so I turned in my two weeks on Friday. I didn't show up on Saturday the day before Easter one of the busiest days of the year. That was a No Call No Show I was laughing all day I felt so devious. =) Then on Sunday I came in to work 2pm-11pm and said Yeah today is my last day. I got there at 2pm and I told 6 Customers to go Fuck Themeselves. 5 to Go Brush their teeth because their breath could strip the paint off a buick. (This joke holds a bit of reference because Kokomo, IN has the Chrysler Transmission Plant and 98% of Kokomo, IN works there. So they found anything GM offensive). The manager came and got me off the register and said Your going home now. This was awesome I got to go sit in the back room and they were like how come you didn't show up on Saturday. I said because I hate you with a bizarre passion and everything you stand for and the overall fact you are a annoying bitch who only gets off on feeding your lies of shit to everyone and I amazed that so many people follow you. I think she wanted to rip my eyes out because she left the room. Linda Leake I hope she is on welfare somewhere. (Funny Note about this since I am ranked in Google shortly after this is posted you can type Linda Leake in Google and this will come up. I feel so powerful sometimes)

But leaving that place I was so happy I took that shitty blue vest and burned it and destroyed it for all eternity. Then I went to work for Best Buy as a Tech. I will save all those stories for another post.

I used to have a graphic I made which I will locate when I get home that had the Wal-Mart Font in a Logo I modified that ran like this "Wal*Fucks*You*In*The*Ass*And*Steals*Your*Soul*Mart" it was beautiful I think it's hidden in the archives of my FTP Server. So I will pull that up when I get home.

Stay Beautiful World.

P.S. Mwa Ha Ha